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Gunslinger

from Bearded Zombies by Ghostface

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lyrics

Damn! It was a casual day when I've been watching my favorite high noon show
when my internet got so fucking slow
And what else can a cowboy do
When connection ain't pushing through
Than to put on a hat, get on a horse
and head to the saloon of course
Barman was an assface
Fucker was making me mad
And all it took was something that he said
So I put a gun against his head
My gun is guiding all my actions
And everything I see
with poisonous efficiency
it kills out all the heat
and then ticking away, and then ticking away
when the clock has started to indicate
that slow internet is the main cause of death
IN THE WILD WILD WEST
Before I realized there already was a price on my head
some bastard took me to the county jail
For fucks sake
It started like a perfect fucking day
And now I'm stuck here with most wanted men
They put me down in the cell with this filthy gringo
and the way he smelled made me head to the window
I took a look outside - what a surprise
I saw the sheriff, talking to another guy
He handed over my bounty, guy’s face got brighter
I recognized my internet provider!
God damn! what a treachery!
Blackmailing sheriff over dirty browser history!
Then it all made sense to me
So many cowboys died
all thanks to this fucking clown
So I challenged him to a high noon showdown
My gun is guiding all my actions
And everything I see
with poisonous efficiency
it kills out all the heat
and then ticking away, and then ticking away
when the clock has started to indicate
that slow internet is the main cause of death


"Allright, you sick fuck.
So you think you can mess with a cowboy's internet and not take any god damn consequences?
Well, it's your lucky day.
'Cause I've been watching all seasons of 'The Gunsliger' on Westflix.
And now I’m gonna show you something
So you better watch and learn."

SO I WENT AND SHOT THE HORSEFUCKER DEAD
BUT ONE THING SLIPPED MY MIND
THAT WITHOUT HIM, THERE WILL BE NO INTERNET
NO INTERNET

credits

from Bearded Zombies, released August 7, 2019

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Ghostface Moravskoslezský, Czech Republic

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